Wednesday, May 25, 2011

This is goodbye.

Alrighty then. I haven't written in a while.. a long while. Life's been a mess and well.. I just haven't found the right time to write about it, i guess. we're moving away in less than a month, my finals are next week, i have my.. uhm... weight problems to handle, and the whole photography thing as well. the pressure of it all is just screwing up everything. i can't think straight at all. i always get the wrong meaning of things and then get upset over it. i spend hours alone just staring at the ceiling when i could be doing something MUCH more productive. i fall into tears much more easily than i did before. listening to indie shit like mgmt and my diary is basically keeping me alive right now. 

my mum says that i need to be strong. but i can't do that. i don't think i can be strong right now. it's like the fear of going back to where i was born and brought up is taking over me in ways i didn't expect. i'm drowning and there's no one out here to save me. as depressing and "emo" as it may sound, it's true. it feels like people are pushing me away and that i'm not wanted anymore. i don't even know why i'm typing this crap up here anyway. it's a good let-out source. and yeah... i don't know what to say anymore. i'm done. thank you for reading. :}

tanvi x

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